Eat Your Heart Out
Heart-felt writing advice your head will envy
Eat your heart out” is a bizarre phrase. Yet, it inspired a thought as I replied to a client’s email. The night before, he’d said to me, “I am very capable of writing. It just takes me a really long time.” He went on to share more details about how he starts, then deletes, and begins again. As he shared more about the hesitancy cycle in his writing practice, I knew the problem right away and was ready with what some might think of as a banal solution: just write. Trust me; it works.
Renewed energy
The following day, he emailed me a completed draft of a piece he’d written. He provided context for what he was trying to convey in the attached document. He said a few other things in the email, but what struck me most was the difference in energy from a few hours before. I could sense his sense of accomplishment, and it was contagious. Positive peer pressure made me gush, “I did some writing last night too!”
As I closed my email reply, I signed “Just Write” as I typically do, but I truly wanted to add, “Just write your lil’ heart out.” I resisted and instead started to pen this piece. Despite being straightforward advice, writing your heart out really is all you have to do to get to first base — a first draft, which many, regardless of writing experience, can find difficult to start.
Be a heart-to-page conduit
Let’s say you have an idea — strong emotions around an issue, feelings about something you’ve heard, a belief that you may be “on to something,” or an idea that you think deserves grant funding. As you mull it over, you begin to think about, “Oooh, this is good; I need to capture this!” Those ideas, whatever they are, that spark that gets you excited or moved in some way, are right there with you in your heart. Your job, Dear Writer, is to be the heart-to-page conduit for your thoughts.
Sounds easy enough, yet we sit to write with nothing but a blinking cursor, unable to put thoughts to the page. Nothing is more frustrating than having the words right there, but they don’t come out. Your ideas were flowing just a minute ago, but when you got to the computer, your bomb dot com thoughts imploded to rubble.
World-renowned actor James Earl Jones, once a stutterer, is quoted as, “One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can’t utter.” I can relate to that from the viewpoint of the pen or the keyboard. Fear, anxiety, intimidation can make it challenging to pull the words out from hiding in the comfort of self. Then, when we finally muster up a sentence or two, we read it, decide we don’t like it, and backspace it away: Delete. Delete. Delete.
The heart wants what the heart wants
We’ve all tapped our way out of saying something on the keyboard back to just a blinking cursor. Thoughts that runneth over before you get to your device are now challenging to get out onto paper. One reason for this is that we ignore what’s on the heart and instead give priority, valuable energy, to what’s in our head when we sit to write.
Our heads house our thoughts, knowledge, ideas. Even when we want to signify something that we know, tapping the side of the head with a finger is a motion we’ll make, giving credence to your thoughts being of the head. Now, don’t get me wrong. There is a lot up there that you need. But your heart is where the spark is.
Thus, the heart wants to go first with the juicy, messy stuff. It pumps the fuel to get your thoughts flowing. Your feelings, emotions, beliefs — the heart stuff — make you want to share with the world. In other words, have a heart-to-heart conversation with your audience. Say you desire to motivate behavioral change, spark a new understanding, encourage healing laughter, or even incite anger. You can’t or won’t easily achieve that if you stay inside your head.
Your head has a place — don’t worry
“How should I begin, which word would sound better here, or how can I make this more concise” are examples of the head doing what it is supposed to do — providing caution, keeping order, telling the heart to slow down while you check a resource or get distracted by another thought. And, you need that because if you only listened to your heart, you’d make choices that defy all reason landing you where you don’t want to be. Hello — can I get an “Amen!”?
But, we need the head to give the heart a chance first. The heart is sensitive, you know. If questioned too much, too early, she, the heart, will retreat in silence to protect itself and get nothing done.
So, look in the mirror and tell your pretty little head, “Don’t you worry. I still need you; There is plenty you’ll need to do — we are good.”
Got it? Good.
Just write
So, in your writing time, have a heart: be bold, courageous, vulnerable, funny — it’s all good. No one’s judging, so neither should you. The head understands and will wait for its turn. Writing, especially during the early drafts, is your heart’s time to shine.
By all means, write your lil’ heart out.
